The Intuitive Nature of Death

Death is probably the toughest thing to process. Witnessing the dying process of someone you care about takes up so much energy, there’s not much left for anything more than what’s absolutely necessary.

A good friend lost her fight with cancer last month, and I found myself thinking a lot about life and death; I also thought a lot about my father’s battle with cancer, which ended with his death five years ago. In both of those situations, there was a day when they knew they were going to die. You could hear the acceptance in their voices; you could see the resignation in their actions. I think dying is a very intuitive process. Those who are in tune with their bodies and their spirits just know that the time is near.

Both my dad and my friend talked about dreams they had of others who had passed before them; both talked of a different state of awareness at times during their final days. A great book that helped me understand that process when I was going through it with my dad was Final Gifts: Understanding the Special Awareness, Needs, and Communications of the Dying.

It was written by two hospice workers and it talks about that different state of awareness when a person is literally living between two worlds. It reassured me that he would be ok going through the dying process and afterward.

I did honor my feelings of sadness last month and this month. I didn’t feel much like blogging, so I didn’t. Now I do, so I am. I guess that’s what living intuitively is about.

Listening for the Little Things

Often we think of intuition as this sense that helps us to predict the big things: warn us of danger, tell us which job to pick, clue us in on the true motives of that person.

Last week, I couldn’t get the idea of a jigsaw puzzle out of my mind. When I was growing up, my family always had a jigsaw puzzle on the dining room table where any of us would sit down and work on it when we had a spare moment, sometimes together, sometimes separately. I’d forgotten those memories and how much I enjoyed the hours spent trying to figure out how the individual pieces came together to form an amazing picture.

After the idea of a jigsaw puzzle nagged at me for four days, I broke down, drove to Target and bought one. That very night I received bad news about a friend who’s been ill, who likely is living out her final days. Naturally, the news was devastating. But interestingly I’ve found a lot of solace through working on my puzzle. Doing so quiets my mind and creates a sense of peace in me.

It may seem trivial that my intuition was calling for me to get that puzzle last week, but I’m glad I listened.

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Nowhere is the power of intuition so evident as when you hear stories of people somehow ‘knowing’ they have some medical illness and getting treatment in time. Particularly when the marvels of medicine say everything’s ok.

Last week, my 92-year-old grandfather didn’t feel right, though he had just been to the doctor and been told that everything was ok. He wasn’t in pain, but “I just knew something was off,” he told me. He called my aunt and said he thought he should go to the hospital. Long story short, doctors told him that had he not come into the hospital he might not have been around to tell me that story.

About 11 years ago, Alice Soler had a clear mammogram, yet she had the feeling that something was wrong. So she told her doctor she wasn’t satisfied. Her doctor – who’s got to be commended for this – listened to her and ordered a sonogram. Turns out, Soler had breast cancer.

Today she’s a survivor and an advocate for others, but her willingness to listen to her own nagging feeling saved her life.

No matter how awe-inspiring the latest medical technology is, I don’t think it will ever be able to keep up with our bodies’ own inner knowing.

Titanic Premonitions of Doom

One thing I’ve noticed is that a lot of stories of intuition seem to revolve around tragedies. I’m not sure if that’s because people’s intuition sometimes gets stronger in an attempt to warn them of impending danger or if people are just more likely to notice gut feelings of doom.

There were many fascinating stories of intuition surrounding the Titanic. A number of survivors and victims of the boat’s sinking confided to others prior to the trip that they had a bad feeling about it.

Among them: The Washington Herald in 1912 wrote an article describing how novelist Jacques Futrelle, who died on the Titanic, had a strong enough premonition two weeks before the tragedy to set up powers of attorney for his and his wife’s affairs.

Annie Ward, a maid who survived, told her mother she didn’t want to get on the ship because she was afraid something was going to happen, according to the Evening Bulletin.

Major Archibald Butt reportedly received a warning that he’d die on his trip abroad so he made a will before he left and settled his affairs.

The New York Times reported that George Quincy Clifford, who died in the wreck, took out $50,000 worth of extra life insurance prior to traveling.

You can read more stories of the Titanic premonitions here. Clearly something to think about.

What? No Burning Bush?

Since I’ve been writing this blog several people have felt compelled to tell me about their intuitive moments. (I enjoy hearing about them so keep them coming).

I’ve heard several stories of people thinking of someone the moment before that person called. I heard a story about someone knowing a relative would be stopping in unexpectedly from out of town. And I heard a story in which someone felt compelled to contact a former colleague and the conversation led to a job offer.

The interesting thing about all of these stories: they were so anticlimactic. There was no major defining moment, no overwhelming feeling of certainty, just a quick thought or a slight tug of interest. Nothing like the dramatic visions or terrifying dreams you see in movies like The Sixth Sense or television shows like Medium.

Maybe the people I know just aren’t that intuitive yet. But more likely, I think we often miss out on what our intuition is trying to tell us because we’re looking for something far grander. While some people may in fact have the heartstopping visions, I'll settle for the butterflies in my stomach or the quick thought that seems to pop into my mind out of nowhere.

I like the following advice from Meredith Self, a professional intuitive who teaches others how to work with their intuition. She says: “Drop the need for intuition to be a burning bush or great visions. Seriously. Not necessary and distracting for most people... Expect simple.”

Works for me.

Honoring the Instinct to Rest

It’s been a few days since I’ve written because I felt the overwhelming need to rest. I don’t know if it was the holiday weekend or the winding down of the summer, but my body felt tired and I could sense that burnout was on the horizon.

A couple of years ago, I would have kept going, ignoring my body and I probably would have eventually gotten sick – my body’s way of forcing me to slow down.

Researchers have proven what the body intuitively knows: According to studies cited in this article by Marie Claire, chronic work stress can be as harmful to you as smoking and not exercising.

So after listening to my intuition and taking last week off, this week I feel energized, creative and rested. It may seem like a simple concept to just listen to your body but so many of us ignore what’s right in front of us.

We often get caught up in the dramatic stories of intuition in action, such as my previous post on Jaycee Dugard. But intuition is about recognizing the little things that we need minute-by-minute and day-by-day. It’s not something that we can plan weeks in advance; it’s about acknowledging your needs in the moment and responding to them.

Intuitive Action Item: You’ve probably planned out much of your work vacation time but if you haven’t scheduled all of it, leave some days free for “intuitive health” days. You can’t predict when your body will intuitively need a rest.

How Intuition Saved Jaycee Dugard

Intuition played a role in another major news story. Last week Jaycee Dugard, who had been abducted 18 years ago when she was 11, was found and her captor, Philip Garrido, was arrested.

Just as intriguing as the story itself was one of the factors that led to Dugard’s discovery: the intuition of a police officer and a campus safety officer with the University of California, Berkeley.

Both women, upon meeting Garrido, felt that something was off. In fact, that feeling led police officer Allison Jacobs to call Garrido’s parole officer, which eventually led to the discovery of Dugard and Garrido’s arrest.

This story is a good example of how to use intuition. The two officers trusted their gut instincts and then did some research to see if they were right. It’s also interesting that it’s becoming more socially acceptable for people to talk about the role intuition plays in their lives. Hopefully it will inspire someone to speak up like those officers did when intuition throws up a red flag.